He Looks Like A Monkey

Is there anything sweeter in a relationship thanmanaged to insult me and leave me, the science
having your girlfriends mother support it onegeek, wondering exactly which primate I
hundred percent? There probably is, but I can'tresemble.I am secretly wishing for chimpanzee,
remember. Usually when a mother meets me,but my girlfriend assures me that my features
she's either impressed by my etiquette, orlend me more towards the baboon side of the
appreciates my honesty. I'd like to think I'mgenus.Can I blame her? Sure I can; but I wont.
generally the kind of guy most girls wouldn't beThe drama queen in me wants to be mad, but
terrified of bringing home to meet the "folks", andafter being dumped by my girlfriend twice, having
most parents wouldn't mind seeing with thierher sister call me a bitch and my parents yell at
daughter. In 99.9% of relationships I've been in, itsme to about everything in general, looking like a
worked out like that.Let me tell you about themonkey is the least of my worries. In fact, it
other 0.01%I've been called many things bymay just bring me luck!So perhaps my
parents. Most mothers would call me respectful,baboon-like tendencies will be responsible for an
kind, honest and perhaps even funny and a goodamazing MCAT score? Perhaps they will prevent
conversationalist. You can now add "looks like ame from being dumped once a week? Perhaps
monkey" to the list of fine titles.Granted, this isthey'll help me choose the right lotto numbers? It
probably true so it technically wouldn't be slander -honestly doesn't matter, because I've already
but nuances aside, I still maintain my right to begotten a good chuckle for the most inventive
shocked by my girlfriends mother drawinginsult a girlfriends mother ever threw my
attention to my Curious George like features! Iway.Respect goes to the mother who can make
would have preferred "cute monkey" or evenme laugh while raping me of my pride and dignity
"disease free simian", but she didn't even specifyat the same time.Cheers to you Aunty.
the species or status as a vector. She has