| We all understand the significance of agility to | | | | I was grateful that my beginner's depth was |
| grow a successful business. But how agile are we | | | | limited to 45 feet, but swimming along the side of |
| really and how can agility in our personal life help | | | | the wall I was still clearly in another world, with |
| us grow in our business life? | | | | nothing under my fins but darkness. |
| A near-drowning experience when I was a child | | | | Soon I was keenly observing the sea life; coral |
| left me wary of swimming and totally unwilling to | | | | heads, bulbs, fans and thousands of fish, all sizes |
| go deeper than snorkeling along the water's | | | | and temperaments, from the diminutive clown fish |
| surface on a trip to Fiji. | | | | bravely defending his anemone home, to the shy |
| Before Tom and I went to Fiji, he had already | | | | 35-pound sweetlips, who disappeared into his coral |
| been scuba diving many times during the | | | | cavern at the first sight of us. My dive master |
| preceding five years. I'd heard his fun stories, but | | | | floated serenely behind me, arms crossed, |
| I knew he still occasionally experienced anxiety | | | | conserving breath and energy. Only his fins were |
| due to a long-ago diving incident. Tom, the | | | | moving, even when the menacing 10-foot reef |
| daredevil, with all his diving experience, having | | | | sharks swam past us. |
| anxiety? That made it even harder for me to | | | | As my breathing became more relaxed and quiet, |
| decide to go for it. The only way I would venture | | | | I began to hear the sounds of the sea life. |
| out on the dive boat was with the promise to | | | | Midway, Tom joined me, held my hand in |
| myself that I could choose not to go into the | | | | celebration, and I lost all sense of time, depth - |
| water. | | | | and my childhood fear. While I'll never be a fish in |
| Upon arrival at the reef, the first thing the dive | | | | the water, I was now enjoying their world. Even |
| master talked about was sharks. "This is their | | | | more, I was enjoying my newfound agility. |
| world. They're in control. Don't approach or move | | | | Challenge a Fixed Viewpoint |
| toward them. Respect them. Respect their | | | | Where would I be if I hadn't challenged my fear |
| space." Actually, sharks didn't scare me at all. I | | | | of water? Probably where I am now, but with |
| was too afraid of the water to worry about | | | | less confidence. I believe the happiest people are |
| sharks. First I had to get into the water. Then I'd | | | | those who are always growing and stretching. |
| think about sharks. | | | | The only way to grow is to question, challenge, |
| Several years earlier on Maui I had tried to learn | | | | probe for new answers and be agile enough to |
| to dive. On that first attempt Tom, my | | | | try new things. |
| 14-year-old nephew Matt and I started our | | | | In a career, you grow or you die professionally. |
| lessons in the pool. As soon as the water closed | | | | Most of us are willing to stretch when it comes to |
| over my face mask and I struggled with the | | | | our careers. It's expected. You strive for a bigger |
| weight of the tank and BCD vest that threatened | | | | paycheck, a bigger promotion, more influence or |
| to drown me, I climbed out of the pool and didn't | | | | more power. Why don't we do the same in our |
| look back. Within the safety of the shore, I | | | | personal lives? One always affects the other. |
| enjoyed a massage instead. While they took to | | | | In life, as in your career, when you neglect |
| the ocean like fish, exploring coral reefs, | | | | growth, the passion inside you cools. Plan not only |
| shipwrecks and the limitless variety of sea life, I | | | | for a bigger house or an updated vehicle, but for |
| clung to my beach chair with my self-help book. | | | | inner growth. Try to reinvent yourself on a |
| On later vacations Tom and I worked out a | | | | regular basis. You don't want to wake up five |
| compromise. He would dive, then return to | | | | years from now and greet the same person in |
| snorkel with me. Although not much of a | | | | the mirror. You want to see a woman who has |
| swimmer, I was a great flailer. I snorkeled in the | | | | transcended her former boundaries. Refusing to |
| shallows, where I could stand up when I tired | | | | grow and stretch keeps you locked in a box of |
| from flailing or needed to adjust my mask. Yoga | | | | your own making, just as not taking that dive |
| practice had prepared me for proper breathing | | | | might have kept me out of the deep underwater |
| and body control, and over time my confidence | | | | world for the rest of my life. We set up our own |
| grew. So did the quality of my flailing. To this day | | | | failure when we believe those insidious mantras, "I |
| my nephew calls me shark bait. | | | | can't...I don't...I wasn't trained for that." |
| Back to Fiji: I watched a young girl with a mental | | | | A woman in one of our seminars who was |
| disability go out doggedly every day learning to | | | | struggling with the fast-paced training became |
| dive, while I stayed safely on the surface, afraid | | | | upset because she couldn't record the program. I |
| to leave my shallow comfort zone for the deeper | | | | offered to let her leave the seminar that day and |
| unknown. I wondered who had the greater | | | | take with her the DVD program to study at |
| disability, she or I. Hers was real, mine only | | | | home at her own pace. |
| imagined. Who was more agile? | | | | She refused the offer. Instead, she sat on the |
| Every afternoon, Tom regaled me with stories of | | | | front row the entire six days talking to herself, |
| turtles, lionfish, hammerhead sharks and the | | | | escalating her frustration and not listening to a |
| vibrant coral he saw on his dives while I continued | | | | word of the seminar. At the end of the program, |
| flailing about in the shallows. But each day I | | | | she was one of only a few women who failed |
| snorkeled into deeper and deeper water until | | | | the certification examination. Ninety-five percent |
| finally, on day four of my vacation, I built up the | | | | of the class passed. She had sabotaged herself |
| confidence to approach the edge of a 300-foot | | | | by self-talk. Perceiving her condition to be less |
| wall. Looking into its depths I was suddenly no | | | | than perfect, she created, then reinforced, those |
| longer content to observe from the surface. My | | | | perceived conditions. Even if the class seemed |
| curiosity engaged, I longed to dive deep and | | | | overwhelming, she could have dramatically |
| envelope myself in the dark wonders below. I | | | | improved her experience by challenging her fixed |
| resolved to try diving again. | | | | viewpoint. |
| My first dive was in a shallow bay. I clung to the | | | | That's not to say we should shut our eyes to |
| bottom, pulling up sand and sea grass at 15 feet | | | | problems. Agility comes in recognizing what's not |
| down. Easy. Being close to the bottom gave me | | | | working and fixing it. But there's a difference |
| security and perspective, and the small success | | | | between complaining or stirring up unrest and |
| encouraged me to go for more. | | | | pointing out a situation that needs to be changed. |
| On the second dive I dove longer and deeper to | | | | When employees come to me with a complaint, I |
| 25 feet. On my third dive, we boated to a sandy | | | | say, "Don't criticize - strategize and offer an |
| ledge that led to the 300-foot wall I was ready to | | | | alternative." I don't expect the perfect solution, |
| explore. The boat rocked on five-foot swells. Tom | | | | but I do expect a suggestion. |
| and the dive master rolled off the side of the | | | | I didn't always own a sizeable company. I grew up |
| boat backwards - the standard diver's show-off | | | | selling Avon, working at Burger King and then |
| entry. When the dive master instructed me to do | | | | working as a nurse. Owning a growing company |
| the same, I said, "No way!" and headed down the | | | | constantly challenges my viewpoints and has |
| narrow stepladder designed for deck shoes, not | | | | taught me this attitude: "Wherever you are, make |
| fins. No easy feat. Tom said it was typical of me | | | | the most of it by questioning, probing and |
| to take the hard way down. Stepping from the | | | | challenging fixed viewpoints." Add a sense of |
| ladder, I slid beneath the surface. | | | | wonder and curiosity. The more you open up to |
| After the initial roller coaster ride associated with | | | | the amazing world around you, the more agility |
| equalizing my ears and my anxiety, we swam | | | | you will have. |
| along the shallow bottom to the precipice and | | | | I could easily have enjoyed Fiji without flexing my |
| slowly dropped into the 300-foot abyss. | | | | agility beyond snorkeling, but after I challenged |
| Surprisingly, the stability and quiet of being | | | | my viewpoint, Fiji became an unforgettable, |
| underwater was a wonderful respite from the | | | | life-changing experience. Inside every woman is |
| swells that bounced the boat on the surface. | | | | the agility to be anything she wants to be and to |
| Anyway, it does no good to scream underwater. | | | | do everything her passionate vision demands. |